He loves me. He loves me not.

I trust my gut so completely, I am thrown when it's wrong.
Though I don't know yet if it is because
You felt it too.
The connection
The magnetism
The knowing.
But how long was it sustained in you?
One week?
One month?
One year?
All this time later and I assume you are thinking about us just as I do.
Selectively choosing which posts to "like" and which to ignore.
Closely following my life, but never admitting as much.
Content to know only enough to satisfy the itch.
Never enough to make a commitment.
To us
To love
To surrender.
Perhaps you see how truly I could love you
And it scares you
And it's easier to pull away and chase the superficial
The familiar.
Or perhaps you see right through me
To the lonely girl holding out for an honesty you will never grant.
Whatever my fate, I own it.
It's just that,
I trust my gut so completely, I am thrown when it's wrong.

Jennie

✏️ Writer • 🎤 Speaker • 🙋🏻 Teacher • RESILIENT OPTIMIST • Sharing words of love and compassion.